Song of the Week – I’m Commander Shepard, the man with the method

Another of MMGaming’s favourite artist’s Dan Bull is back with this week’s Song of the Week. This weeks Song of the Week is another Epic Rap and this time features Mass Effect 1 and 2, rather topical considering the recent release of Mass Effect 3.

Topical, funny, interesting. BOOM!

I’d like to combine this session of absolute awesome and blazing tune-ness with a request. Getting a Song of the Week out there every week is actually proving a bit tricky. Especially as we try to give you Gaming themed songs. While we wouldn’t mind posting just some cool dubstep, or drum and bass or whatever to get the wubwub going we would prefer to get something game/nerd related (even if it’s the theme tune of some game trailer).

So with that in mind, if any of you folks ever come across anything that you think deserves the top spot as Song of the Week then give us a shout!

Either go via my e-mail: or our Facebook or Twitter accounts!


And now for something completely different!

You see I have been scanning the internets trying to find the lyrics for this song for the last three weeks or so and I haven’t been able to find any. So with that in mind, I’ve decided to post the lyrics to this bundle of awesome here! Enjoy:


I’m Commander Shepard,

The man with the method,

To brandish a weapon,

And then handle the Geth with it.

I’m an effortless hero,

My rhymes shine brighter than element zero,

Bringing more fire than Emperor Nero.

It’s the end of an ear, Yo!

There’s something mysterious with Saren Arterius,

Committing violence against Nihlus, I’m furious.

I’ll chase him from place to place,

Base to base,

Until we’re face to face,

I’m serious.

From the Sirius Relay to Artemis Tau,

I’ll tighten the net. I’m not far from him now.

I’ll fight all the Geth till that bastard is found,

And leave his heart in the ground.

I’m the southpaw outlaw scoundrel,

Bringing down more tools than a whole ground force.

Listen out now, fool.

It’s pretty damn doubtful,

That I’ll be sitting down with the citadel council.

The Reapers are keen to bring about your downfall,

So me and my team are about to flout laws.

I’ll introduce you to the whole of my party:

Garrus, Liara T’Soni and Tali,

Wrex, Kaiden, Ashley, Joker, The Army

Who roll with an Asari,

Older than Atari.

A Krogan that’ll leave you cold within a heartbeat,

My team’s hotter than a stolen Ferrari.

Can a Volus go shoulder to shoulder with me?


My ship’s seen off more foes than a Somali’s.

So we’re going on Safari,

To the Far Reaches. It’ll be Gnarly.

Seeing stranger creations than Dali,

And breaking more faces than Arni.


Blown to pieces,

And re-assembled,

I don’t believe this!

It’s bleeding mental!

But then again, with these credentials

Can you blame them for believing me essential?

I don’t wanna be nervously lunching with Cerberus,

I’d prefer to punching a journalist.

Souping up all my guns for the skirmishes,

In which I’ll puncture the firmament, permanent!

I’m bringing a lyrical Mass Effect,

My skill it’d kill a million billion massive Geth.

Commander Shepard formidable syllables.

Hitting the pinnacle, it is a miracle

That commands mass respect.

Incontestable, I’m a professional

But my new boss is less than respectable.

So you better cover up your testicles,

Cos my next method’s something of a spectacle.

More fresh and raw,

Than a vegetable,

Coming from the underground,

With the hunger of a Thresher Maw.

I leave the Rachni with a black eye

Slap Pyjacks with a backhand

Never act nice.

Rap lines sharper than a cacti,

Or the bite of a Varren on a barren planet.

Baptised in flame.

Rise again.

In fact, I’m insane!

Providing pain. Back from the afterlife

Packing an appetite to invade.

This isn’t a driving range,

But I’ll leave you with eighteen holes

Inside of your brain.

Like a Swiss cheese,

Bitch please,

You’ll disbelieve the manner in which I kick frees.

Brining sci-fi to your hi-fi

Is the highlight of your lifetime

With ease!

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